In life, we have to make choices that are not easy. We can choose to sit in our “place of sorrow” or choose to climb out of it. Not that climbing out is easy, but sitting in this “place of sorrow” is not easy either. One of the definitions of the word climb is “to go upward with gradual or continuos progress.”
As we have had to face tough times with Samuel over the years, I look back and think that it was a slow climb to get to where we are today……We have had wonderful people that have been on this climb with us. I think of our wonderful friend Kaley that has loved on Samuel from the time he was 2 1/2 years old. Kaley has kept all of the children as I have traveled for the My Epilepsy Story so we could share about our “My Epilepsy Story”. She has seen him have set backs, blossom, and has cheered for Samuel as he climbed. Our sweet Aunt Joelle, that poured her heart into Samuel to prepare him for this journey of school. She encouraged his strength of science with a weekly trip to the science museum and with daily reminders to him that he can do anything! The Dosunmu family that loved this “quirky” boy and only saw his strengths while telling him that he was a leader in this world. Ms Kate Washburn, a.k.a. “Ms Kake”, as Samuel called her, bonded with Samuel from the moment she met him. On the last time he saw her alive, she turned to him when she heard him enter her hospital room. She could barely talk but just touched my sweet boy’s hand…To this day when he sees a star in the sky he says…”There is Ms Kake’s eye twinkling at me.” Ms Boothe was Samuel’s “buddy” at church. She spoke sweet, loving, and encouraging words to him. She prepared him for his next steps of being independent. The Lindsey family have encouraged us over the past 6 1/2 years. Dima went with Samuel to Boston as we traveled to get testing for Autism. Samuel looked up to Dima the entire time we were there and Dima was an encouragement to Samuel the entire trip. We have the Thompson family that has been our “family” through the years…..Uncle Rob, has encouraged Samuel with his words. Aunt Nancy, has cuddled this little boy as he has faced challenges. She has kept him “safe” when he faced his darkest days last May…..Robert carried Samuel around from the time he was 10 months old. Hudson taught Samuel how to start the process of “growing up” by not carrying him and being his “big brother”. Aunt Lauren asks Samuel tons of questions and reminds him how smart he is. Then there is Nana and Papa Z that tell him he is a genius and find everything possible that has to do with science to send to him. Nana and Papa Z loved this little boy from the moment he was born. There are so many other people that I could go on and on……
Of course there is Dr. Mukundan, that has been his doctor through the years. He saw that Samuel needed help when he was younger and started us on the journey of therapy. Dr. Mukundan has seen him make progress and have set backs. Samuel has continued to amaze his doctor with his knowledge of science. Samuel’s language therapist, Ms Mary, has been our resource from the time he was almost 3 years old. Samuel’s teacher at school, Ms Beth, pushes him to be the best he can be. She loves him and encourages him everyday. His teacher, Mr Z, has been such an encouragement to Samuel this past year. Ms. Miriam, Samuel’s art teacher, sees Samuel’s gift of drawing. Mr. A, Samuel’s music teacher, encourages him to use his voice to sing. And of course, the other children at his school, have been a great example for him to learn how to experience life and school in a positive and safe setting.
Our family has climbed and then fallen and then climbed again. We tried to bandage the wounds from the falls and then began the climb again. With each fall there comes a wound…..These wounds hurt and are painful to the core…..You can try to block out the pain but eventually the pain will return until that wound has been fully cleaned out. Then this wound will become a scar…and this scar will get easier and easier to touch over time. As I look back this evening and look at the mountains that we have been climbing, we still have a long way to go but we are gradually moving upward. Some of these wounds have turned into scars but others are still fresh. We are dealing with the fresh wounds…… while looking at the scars thinking we sure have climbed a long way. Our sweet little boy is continuing to CLIMB his way up these mountains with wonderful people cheering him along. Samuel has made such progress, yet when the falls come you grieve as a parent….
I know that when we reach this mountain top there will be another mountain to climb. I know that I have to be strong and that in the end it will be about how we have climbed…… I wish that we didn’t have mountains to climb but this is our story. Our story is about pushing forward, being strong, being fighters, being survivors, dreaming, and climbing to reach that dream. Each day I look at Samuel and think keep moving my beautiful boy….keep fighting…….keep going…..keep dreaming…. and keep climbing! I cheer for him even louder when he gets knocked down and falls. My heart screams ” This is just a mountain and wait until you get to the top!” Our family has struggled, been wounded, and rocked to the core. We have fallen but we keep climbing……. Here’s a photo of Samuel climbing a tree for the first time at the Guelcher’s house( they are another family that has loved Samuel as he has climbed his mountains). Are you climbing a mountain? In the next year, 6 years, 16 years, 26 years you will see that you have climbed lots of mountains and you will realize that it is about how you handled the climb. Don’t give up….keep climbing!
